Be it with the Princess or the Prince, I'd been "blessed" with people who'd come to me with their "kindly" advices - u shouldn't carry/ rock the baby to sleep, u shouldn't/ should use the sarong, sucking the hand is better/ pacifier is better, u should supplement with formula etc etc.
Many a times, these "words of wisdoms" turned out to be contradictory, as they were based on the individuals' experiences n beliefs. But they were all done with the same motive - trying to tell me that I had done the WRONG thing. And that if I had started off with their method(s), things would have been easier....
U can say that I am difficult to "educate" or I'm plain stubborn, but the fact is, if I listened to every one of the well-meant advices, wouldn't my kids be totally confused? In the end, being "right" in the eyes of some, simply meant that I'm still doing the "wrong" things and I'd end up with frustrated kids who needed to be re-programmed again n again.
Who wouldn't want to do things the easy way, let the babies sleep on their own, "teach" them to sleep throughout the night, ensure they r free from colic/ reflux or whatever that's causing them discomfort? Before u start "sharing" ur "expert" views, do bear in mind that all babies r born unique, into families of differing cultures, made up of parents n grandparents having their own sets of beliefs, tolerance level n working manner. It would be really kind to share some experiences with people u see facing the same child-rearing difficulties, for e.g. "My baby had the same prob. I tried XXXX n it worked. Perhaps u may want to give it a try." But if ur intention is otherwise....
Imagine when u're trying to sooth a cranky baby to sleep, rocking n carrying him in ur arms, walking around. For those who r blessed with sleep-on-their own babies, u probably won't understand how frustrating n tiring this can be. How would u feel if someone comes up and say, "U shouldn't be rocking him/ her. That's y he's/ she's so used to it now." In the first place, if the baby can go to sleep without fussing n wailing ON THEIR OWN, why would anyone want to make life difficult for themselves? Anyway, such an "advice" does not offer any solution, and only serves the purpose of trying to "CORRECT" someone. If that's all the kindness u can offer, PLEASE, LEAVE ME ALONE!
I'm blessed with 2 kids that give me joy, to be able to see them daily, sharing their smiles n love. Though they r definitely not the ez-to-take-care type, both needing extra extra extra efforts to get them to sleep (though the prince seems a little better), I do appreciate some empathy n people willing to share ways they'd tried n worked, however if the best u can offer is pointing out my "mistakes", it will be most sympathetic of u to just zip-up.
THANK Q!!
