1。这是人生的必经阶段 -- 毕了业，找份工作，然后赶搭婚姻列车，接下来当然是升格当父母lor。
2。生一个来玩玩，因为别人的很cute。
3。什么是condom？结果......
4。人家有，我哪里可以没有？Singaporean kiasu mah......
5。政府给bonus leh， 不拿白不拿。
6。哇！通货膨胀那么厉害，生个孩子，下半辈子就靠他了！
7。天理循环，人家生我，我生别人，这样人类才不会绝种嘛。
8。阿爸、阿妈要，就生一个给他们lor。
9。新年才可以回本！！
10。就是喜欢小孩，愿意无私为他们付出，用心教育这些小生命，并期盼他们茁壮成长，将来成为负责任、有爱心，贡献于社会的人。
政府应该鼓励哪一类的家长？还是来者不拒，只要充得那数字，管他是好竽、滥竽。结果推出的措施，只注重于一时的成效，缺乏针对性，或长远的考量。
If you do not even know your target audience, how are you to achieve the desired results?
关关难过，关关过。
今年，要抱着比以往更积极的态度，相信“天将降大任于斯人也，必先苦其心志，劳其筋骨，饿其体肤，空乏其身，行指乱其所为，所以动心忍性，曾益其所不能。”——《孟子。告子下》
Yesterday was the last day of June Holidays, it may also mark the end of my breastfeeding days.
The doctor finally decided to put me on a course of anti-biotics and steroid as my body is not responding to the regular medication. Thus, I would not be able to breastfeed boy till 1 week after I stopped taking the steroid.
I was intending to take out my pump, in case my breasts get engorged. Last evening, sometime after taking my first dose, I felt a strong letdown sensation and thought that I might need to express. However, feeling my breasts, they weren't hard/ full at all. This morning, I realised my breasts had shrunk significantly overnight, so much that they could actually fit comfortably into my pre-pregnancy bra. Did my milk glands "died" overnight?
Although my initial intention was to stop breastfeeding after boy turned 1, and I'd switched him to partial formula since he turned 10 mths, when the time finally arrives, I still feel a tinge of lost and sadness.
Just now, as he saw me pulling up my shirt, he wanted me to breastfeed him and cried when I refused (kept tugging and pulling my shirt up). Sorry, my darling boy. Mommy would have fed you if I could. Mommy's milk will be doing you more harm than good now. Meanwhile, as we go through this transitional phase, pray that we may all recover from our illness soon.
(Our last breastfeeding session - 27 June 2010, Sun morning)
This is so strange......
Even though I know babies n young kids change their habits all the time, but it seems little Kang decided to schedule them all right after his birthday celebration (later than his actual birthday).
He used to be less fussy about missing naps or irregular nap times (something which was an absolute no-no for his sister since Day 1). Right on the day we held his party, he decided to "flex his muscles" and showed what he was actually capable of. He woke up in the middle of the night (which is still pretty common even after we started to introduce partial formula feeding in the night, another strange habit I presumed should have stopped if I weaned him off night-feeds) and wailed inconsolably, even refusing his favourite Daddy's attempts to carry him, waking his granddad from his sleep, again rejecting his offer to carry him and clung on to Mummy (which was definitely not his favourite character before that, only choosing me when he wanted his nene). He pushed and struggled and screamed non-stop and it took him really quite sometime before calming down. I contributed the episode to a mixture of over-tiredness, over-stimulation n a bad tummy due to all the forbidden stuff fed to him by doting uncles (hmmm, u know who u r right ;p). The following few days were difficult, when he refused his food n bottle etc... However, yesterday, during our weekly visit to my ILs, they decided to bring him for a walk during his nap time. I thought since we would be there for less than 3 hrs, I'd just keep quiet n let him catch his nap in the car. It was an absolutely BAD decision. He started grouching when we got into the car and all hell broke lose while we were approaching home. It didn't help when I removed him from his car seat, as he continued to struggle and nearly strangled me with his pushing. I had to hang on to him fervently, for fear that I dropped him while holding my umbrella in the other hand, making sure both kids were sheltered from the rain, as I make my way from the carpark to the lobby. He fell asleep soon after being dropped in his sarong - a sign of extreme tiredness. But that wasn't the end of my woes. He started grouching and wailing again after waking from his nap and refused dinner and was partially consoled when offered my breast. It didn't last. In the end, I had to bring him down for a walk before he finally settled down - a whole 2 hrs saga. At around 1+am, he woke up and duplicated the episode we had on the night of his birthday celebration!!! And finally went back to sleep ard 3am. That left me sleepless for the entire night......
Another incomprehensible act is that, he had decided to boycott the bottle after being introduced to partial formula since 2 months back. The frequency of him refusing to drink his formula has been increasing these few days and he had not taken anything from the bottle for the past 3 feeds, shaking his head whenever being offered one, and getting upset if we repeated our attempts. Suddenly, he decided he wanted to pick up signing "nene" (after simply ignoring all attempts to get him to do so for months. This boy picks on what he wants to learn n shakes his head or ignores u when u're trying to teach him something he's not interested in) and it is only to be used exclusively for Mummy's milk (he did that just now after his swimming session, when it was time for his afternoon feed).
Now, he understands quite a fair bit of what we r talking about. For e.g. when we say beat beat, he'll hit himself on his bum with his hands, when we ask him to drink water and praise him, he'll take his bottle and sip it. Of cos there are more instances.
The Mummy whom wasn't one of his first few choices when it came to playmates, all of a sudden seems to become his close pal. I believe it's probably due to the fact that he is starting to display separation anxiety. Could this be the reason he is refusing his bottles?? Maybe...... I guess my plan to slowly wean him may have to be sidelined for the time being......
Whatever the case, with the changes coming along, I have no choice but to play the bad guy again. It beats tiring myself to death and stretching my boy beyond his tolerance. Afterall, we r the ones to suffer while others simply remain blind to all that happen beyond their scope of view. Sometimes I really feel the strain of having to ferry my younglings all the way down n up every week on my own. Each way is >30mins drive n I know very well the way home will be a torture on most days. Perhaps when something bad happens along one of these trips, then will somebody be "enlightened" and show us some empathy......
漫长的80+天，不知道要怎样过下去？等待、等待还是等待...感觉自己好似急诊室医生，唯一不同的是，I'm on PERMANENT shift, 24小时，每时、每分、每秒都过着紧张，不眠不休的日子。病人时时刻刻都需要我的关注、照顾 and there's no one to take over。Weekdays r bad, Weekends r unbearable. Staying at home is stifling but it beats going out and watching others having their whole family together.
太阳不见了。地球变得冰冷，渐渐失去了她的生命。没有了太阳的地球，到底还能存活吗？
。。。。你这小蛋蛋决定提早出来看世界。好一个凶悍的家伙！你那震耳的啼哭声，如今还在妈妈脑子里响着。
一年下来，你证明了一点--陈颖康是个名副其实的小伙子！只要醒着，你没一刻静得下来。如今会爬，会抚着家具走，更是让妈妈时时都心惊胆战。驾车、骑马、踏脚车、下床、爬桌椅。。。你无一不通。冲凉凉也像大孩子一般，直接用花洒往头上冲。吃东西，喝奶奶总是等不得，一股气把食物快速解决。破坏力更是一等一，别人建，你砸，风扇弄坏了两把。骂你、说你两句，就摔东西，还会跟人吵架，动手。看来，妈妈是不用担心你长大了会被人欺负。
小家伙呀，你怎么那么有主见？无论是吃饭，玩耍，还是往哪个方向走，你总是充满主导性，不愿依他人的意思办，说不吃就不吃，要玩什么，任谁想把它换掉，绝不是件易事，想要往西，要让你往东，恐怕要一番苦战。
妈妈可爱的小儿子，无论你多捣蛋、多调皮，妈妈都欣然接受，心里唯一不太舒服是，为什么你喜欢爸爸多过妈妈？？？
再也无法忍受那群以华文“难”为前提，势必逼迫华文一而再，再而三地降级的无根浮萍！
生、养、教育孩子不难吗？那就不生lor。英文，数学，物理，人文等等等，难道没人喊难，没人因此受影响，总比分被拉低吗？也不见得有什么英文B、科学B等课程的出现（当然了解数学有分为E、A等等。可是要明白的是，即使是我们的基本数学，已比许多欧美国家的水平来的高）。
Ok！如果你要说，以上科目比较有实际用途，我想你的想法应该已落伍了10年吧！以目前的形势而论，接下来的20年里，中国要成为龙头老大，已不再是天方夜谭。到时才来搞华文复兴，把CL1提升为必修课？？？太迟了！
怎么会有人把自己的优势转为怠势？Why choose to be monolingual when the system had been set in place for you to pursue an effectively bilingual (even trilingual n multilingual, considering the structure of our society) education and lifestyle? And the irony is, many of those who go all out singing the tune that they do not know their MT, actually cannot communicate effectively in their oh-so-beloved English (put them with the native speakers and you'll get what I mean).
..... the snow-capped mountains and white flurries in the cold winter months
..... the trees of white, purple, pink following the thawing of the ice
..... the wonderful summer days when kids come out to play
..... the dazzling red and orange, betraying the tranquility that surrounds
Not forgetting...
..... the Wonderful people, the Peace, the Family life that I treasured and once beheld.
"We have gone one full cycle. Opportunity knocks again. Truth be it, I wish for another chance, even if it may be a short one. However, deep inside, I have a feeling it won't be the same. This time round, we probably won't go......"
送走懒洋洋的牛，迎接猛虎的到来，是重新出发的时候了。这一年多的光景，对他而言，应该是卧薪尝胆的体验。如今，也是拨云见月的时机了。无论如何，相信这会是个好的开始。希望接下来的日子，他能够如鱼得水，再创高峰，活得更快乐、更自在。
对于小公主，妈妈还是要对你说“对不起”。你可能会以为妈妈对你的爱少了，越来越没耐性，也没什么时间陪你。其实妈妈心里也感到很抱歉。请你对妈妈多点忍耐与包容，等弟弟大一点，妈妈再好好补偿你。
小王子呢，你就像姐姐baby时，一样可爱，也是个万人迷。性子跟妈妈一样急，超好动，也老爱自顾自地玩，妈妈教你做什么，你都好似“你教你的，我做我的”。也无所谓啦，只要你开心、健康，未来的日子还很长，就慢慢来。
妈妈呢，请你收敛收敛你的脾气，对孩子多点耐心，少点责备，对老公多点体谅，少点埋怨，对父母多点孝顺，少点理所当然，对公婆多开一只眼闭一只眼，少点挑剔。这样，别人多点开心，你也少点烦恼。
也希望所有人能多多包容妈妈，关怀妈妈，让她在忙得没时间照顾自己，睡眠超不足，越来越像黄脸婆的同时，知道还有许多人爱她、appreciate她。
近几个月，脾气越来越暴躁，很容易为了小事发火，对恩也特别没耐性，无法忍受较高分贝的声量，下巴总是潜意思地咬得很紧，导致偏头痛。更可怕的是，对于自己的情绪，越发难以控制，真的感觉好像已经患上了--抑郁症。
为什么我会对孩子的多话感到厌烦？面对她的发问，总是表现得那么没耐性？动不动就对她吼叫......曾经何时，我变得那么恐怖、那么面目可憎？我真的很害怕，害怕在她的成长造成无法弥补的阴影，害怕从此失去这个孩子。这不是我想成为的母亲。
我的宝贝，如果有一天，你不再爱妈妈，认为妈妈讨厌你、不疼你，我希望你能原谅妈妈。
妈妈对你的爱，永远不会变 。
我是个需要安静的人。
很“不幸”的，我身边却有一对大、小蜜蜂，无时无刻在我耳边嗡嗡响，搞得我心烦气躁，有时连吃顿饭、看份报纸或上网都不得安宁。
有没有试过，一个小时内，连环炮似的三、四通电话，都是同一人打来？一个人，一踏进门，毫无“惊喜”的，第一件事就是念念念。不管做什么，还是念念念。叫她不要做，还是念念念......更糟的是，还会跟小孩子一起“争锋吃醋"，“抢”你的注意力，两只蜜蜂一起出击，小的已显出不快，大的那只还不知退一步，继续与她争妈妈的注意力，叫我不发火都难。这还不是致命伤，恐怖的是，大蜜蜂极度敏感，很喜欢通过别人的语气（比如电话里啦），乱加入自己的解读，在找你开战。一旦她盯上你，无论你说什么都没用，非抖个两败俱伤，才能收场，屡战屡试，不见倦色。
小的那只呢，真是“悲哀”。为什么偏就得了隔代遗传，好传不传，就中了“碎碎念”这绝症。她很喜欢重复性地讲同样的事件，讲了又讲，乐此不彼。无论在讲些什么，先决条件是，一定要你参与。参与的定义就是，也要跟着讲，不可以只点头、摇头等，不然她就对你发飙。
本人的忍耐指数超低，碰到这两只贴身蜜蜂，有时真有“生不如死”的感觉。嗨，苦海无涯，回头也找不到岸......
它，是一种五味杂陈的情感。
它，可以是自私的，激发人心的妒忌，让你无法忍受与任何人分享，怀疑自己是否就是他心中的“第一”。
它，可以使你陷入万劫不复痛苦的深渊，变得歇斯底里，变成魔鬼，吞噬掉全世界造就你痛不欲生的一切，甚至于自我毁灭。
它，可以撕心裂肺，犹如一把利刃，一次，又一次，再一次。。。。。。不断地，重复地刺入你的心，直至血肉模糊，血流不止，一滴、一滴、一滴。。。。。。
它，可以使你万般牵挂，牵肠挂肚，不舍、思念、期盼着过日子。
它，可以使你愤愤不平，甚至于愤怒，为的是他所受的不平等待遇、欺压，只恨自己无力解救他于这水深火热。
它，在当你望着他那苍白的脸，被病魔缠身，无法摆脱时，当你知道他在为你们的将来打拼，承受无比压力，你心里的痛、流的血、掉的泪会比所有一切深百倍、千倍、万倍。
尽管它未必荡气回肠，尽管它可能淡如止水，它却是这般缠人，就只因为“爱”。
It had been a challenging time since we came home, esp for this couple of weeks. I guess the reasons r plenty - K's unhappiness at work, re-adjusting to life beyond our own little family, more hectic lifestyle having to fetch En to-n-fro school everyday, increase in familial commitment etc, physical challenges (we have been falling sick one after the other, consecutively, ever since we return, non-stop, so much so the doc's office had become our regular haunt. We must have visited our GP for at least 7-8 times in total since Dec), discomforts from this pregnancy (made worse by my sickness), hormonal changes, the unbearable heat that's causing me rashes outbreak everywhere...... So much so that situation had gotten somewhat out-of-hand in the last weeks, that I'd wallowed in so much self-pity with feelings of being neglected, uncared for n unloved. It must have been a tough time for K too, for I believe he's also going through a very rough patch at work. Being the sole breadwinner, with another mouth to feed soon, the pressure must be intense. Perhaps that accounts partly for his insensitivity. I tried to understand but sometimes when little things add up, over a period of time, it's just too difficult.....
After that particularly scary incident ( I'm sorry I might have traumatised En), I really felt the need to just offload all that's been bugging me, how unbalanced n disrespected I felt at times. And I'm truly surprised n touched at the outcome of my no-holds-bar confession. Something I truly need in a time like this. I hope that things can really take a turn for the better, esp with Baby coming soon (n Yes, he's still superbly active, esp as my cough is disturbing him. I guess he must be very anxious to come out).
Frankly speaking, I do foresee myself going a little crazy after birth (as with En). My dear Boy, hope that u can be my pillar of strength n give me a little extra love, patience n care. 我比上次老了，体力没那么好，又有两个小瓜要照顾，所以真的需要更多的support.
我也想去一趟煮妇的假期，没有时限，没有目的地，没有人知道。只有孩子与我，两个人，去我们的疗伤之旅。
四岁的孩子，情绪其实已不只限于号啕大哭的宣泄。我怎么知道？有一回，她晓得我在生某某的气。某某拿了她的水瓶去喝，她便开始在车上唠唠叨叨，不让某某拿。以我对某某的理解，其实早已知道会发生事情。平时，我会出声制止她，可当时，我在气头上，也懒得理。
果然，接下来就是突如其来的咆哮声：“This is my car! U get out of my car!” 整辆车一时鸦雀无声。这是很不寻常的。果真，我伸手去抚摸她的小手，她转过头来，鼻头红红的，勉强挤了个笑容给我，两滴泪不由自主地滑落，她静静用手抹掉......我的心真得好痛，她只不过是四岁的孩子，怎得会和我一样暗自伤心？
庆幸的是，孩子情绪的反转，想对大人而言，是瞒快的。可是，如果事件一再发生，那种伤害始终无法磨灭。当我们作出某种情绪反应时，可曾想过，对身边的人会造成怎样的影响？留下多深的阴影与烙印？
我想真的该去悠长假期了。
一星期前，本来是要到蔡厝港华人坟场扫墓，通知某某之后，他就一直说会塞车啦、没地方停车啦等等等。其实，在这之前，老爸早已通知我只需去阿公家拜拜即可，因为他也担心到时坟场会塞车，早早就吩咐我不用去。我却故意不说，决定“见机行事”。
到了拜拜那天，我还是决定不去了，因为老妈也提议我作罢，说是哪儿烟雾弥漫，对孕妇不好，毕竟我怀孕快8个月了。
几天后，某某突然说（他们家做事总爱last min通知）他老母跟他说今天要扫墓，而且可能要去好几个地点，他大舅可能会租巴士，全家一齐去环岛拜拜。他满心期待，说是好久没去了。我说如果需“跋山涉水”，那是不可能的，因为我即使是坐着或躺着，都经常会发生呼吸困难，更别说在大太阳底下“攀山越岭”的，搞不好岂不一尸二命。然而，他说我们可在巴士上等（呵呵）。最后，因为他外婆决定只到一处，便决定各自出发，到万里坟场。这情况岂不和我们当初去蔡厝港坟场的情况一样，得面对塞车、没停车位等问题？谁知当初的诸多不便，如今他却只字不提。这次可没父母为我设身处地的着想，ok lor，还是那句“见机行事”。
出发前，我老妈“好言相劝”，可是“忠言逆耳”，我们还是“依计行事”。结果，还未转进万里路，车龙已是见尾不见首，车子根本无法向前行驶。可又不见某人意兴阑珊，反观还主意多多，决定另觅去路。兜了一圈，从汤盛路驶入，情况虽较好，可是到了驶入坟场的交叉口，情况依然恶劣。
到了此时此刻，仍然无人作声，一旦转入交叉口，便是进退两难了，不知会堵上几小时。既然无人照顾我的处境，我只好“自保”，便提议让他父母在车站下车，与其他人会合，我们等他们拜完再来充当司机。可是某某却一意孤行，一定要驶进去。他说要我们在车里等！天啊！这一等要等上几小时，开冷气会导致一氧化碳中毒，不开冷气岂不变成炭烤烧猪？？？后来，我家婆不好意思，提议下车，他还是坚持己见，直到我家翁也决定下车，他才只好作罢。
我心里真的真的很气，不仅生气，也很不服气。我一而再，再而三的给他机会，这么多年了，他还是“大小眼”！最不应该的是，他始终不懂得关心及爱惜我，更谈不上保护。这起事件，只不过是冰山一角，我真的不再指望他会发自内心的爱护我了。
天啊，我竟然是左左人！
这是按《早报》的一项性格测试所得到的结果。
左左人--认真又冷酷的完美主义者。虽颇有女人/男人味，但却是这四种类型中，最具有男子气概的。凡事都能条理分明的理论性思考，会凭着一篇大道理迅速打败他（人）。
自尊心极强，正义感也比他人多上一倍。做为朋友是很值得信赖，但若与之为敌就会很棘手。不过，因生性认真又是完美主义者，常会让初次见面的人留下难以相处的不好印象。
不得不承认，还相当准确，但我还不至于冷酷吧？？！！果真如此的话，做起许多事来，反而不会觉得绑手绑脚，可一鼓作气把那些不知死活，惹毛老娘的人，连根拔起，捏得连灰都不剩！
或许感情这潭浑水，我玩不起
或许人际关系，我永远无法掌握
或许我根本不属于这个年代
或许我的存在是上帝开了个大玩笑
或许做人应该“笨”一点
或许我才是真正的笨蛋
或许明天会有奇迹
或许今天将是据点
或许人生仅是如此，真实的只有我那手心里的宝
回来之前，早已预知这种状况的到来......
本还抱着一丝期望，一年的经历或许能起着些许作用，现实总还是得接受“距离”的挑战。“距离”越近，“影响”越是如磁铁般展示着它的力量。要来的始终还是来了，我的人生回到了四年前的原点。
有些事永远无法改变，有些人只能盼“距离”这条鸿沟能把他远远地隔开。我甚至为了避开他，宁愿选择离乡背井，离开我的至亲，离开我的避风港，离开我熟悉的环境，为的只是想得到一丝平静，恢复我的家庭宁静，还原我本应有的自由与舒畅。
带我离开吧......
