Carpe Diem - easier said than done for a self-professed procrastinator. But for the love of my life, I finally keyed my first sentence, then the second, and the third... as a recording of memories I'd want to remember, good or bad, a gift from Mommy to U - Dear Baby En

"From Baby En to Baby Kang, both my darlings, equally precious. May this journal keep u company, when Mummy can no longer be there......"

Created with Admarket's flickrSLiDR.

Friday, 10 April 2009

煮妇的假期

我也想去一趟煮妇的假期,没有时限,没有目的地,没有人知道。只有孩子与我,两个人,去我们的疗伤之旅。

四岁的孩子,情绪其实已不只限于号啕大哭的宣泄。我怎么知道?有一回,她晓得我在生某某的气。某某拿了她的水瓶去喝,她便开始在车上唠唠叨叨,不让某某拿。以我对某某的理解,其实早已知道会发生事情。平时,我会出声制止她,可当时,我在气头上,也懒得理。

果然,接下来就是突如其来的咆哮声:“This is my car! U get out of my car!” 整辆车一时鸦雀无声。这是很不寻常的。果真,我伸手去抚摸她的小手,她转过头来,鼻头红红的,勉强挤了个笑容给我,两滴泪不由自主地滑落,她静静用手抹掉......我的心真得好痛,她只不过是四岁的孩子,怎得会和我一样暗自伤心?

庆幸的是,孩子情绪的反转,想对大人而言,是瞒快的。可是,如果事件一再发生,那种伤害始终无法磨灭。当我们作出某种情绪反应时,可曾想过,对身边的人会造成怎样的影响?留下多深的阴影与烙印?

我想真的该去悠长假期了。

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